CHOICES? YEH WE GOT EM! Part E of a ramble

2015/02/24
Some things to think about part E

CHOICES? YEH WE GOT EM!
DSCN2950 (2)       Remember warm days?

WOMEN CAN DO IT. WHY CAN’T GUYS?
My mother told me that back in the 1940s through early 60s, when she went anywhere like shopping, church, school meetings, or a restaurant, she had to be dressed up. That meant a dress, necklace, stockings, heels, hair curled, makeup on, maybe a hat, and maybe gloves. If it was winter she had high heel boots and a coat, along with heavier gloves. Pants were for men. Women were rebels if they wore pants anywhere but in the home. They could face social pressures ranging from wardrobe choice comments to sexual orientation slurs. I remember hearing speculation about famous actresses and their less than totally feminine wardrobe choices. Since those days women have taken the right to wear just about anything they want any where they choose. From a hoodie and jeans at The Mall to a Burka in downtown Grand Rapids, to a string bikini on Washington Street in Grand Haven. They can, in one day, morph from looking like any guy down the street, to a princess in sequins and heels. No one challenges them, whatever they want, within some ever evolving, ever expanding social norms.

MEN’S CHOICES HAVE CHANGED, A BIT.
Back in the 1950s and 60s our dad’s and their sons wore gray, blue, black from the tip of our toes to their necks. Yes there were white dress shirts and maybe brown suits and shoes. Expression when dressed up was through the tie, but still within limits. If you wore a bow tie to work, you were different, less serious, than a guy wearing a Windsor knot, who was management material. In school, if we showed up in red Converse gym shoes, we would be called “red shoes” by the gym teacher and oh how glad we were when they wore out prematurely! It has improved since then, but not to the full freedom of choice women enjoy. Men are still wearing the basic socially approved wardrobe. They have also won the right to school colors, so in the right context they may wear red, green, yellow, blue, white, and in strict moderation, gold and silver. The casual neck line and pant hem have become more liberal but maybe not in the best of taste. There are more choices but the guys never morph. A guy is a guy, at least in the mainstream, like your neighbor, dad, or uncle.

Crossdressing need not be a crises for everyone involved. Sure some guys want to go the Full Monty and become women. But the vast majority of crossdressers that I encounter just want to have fun, like Cindy Lauper’s song Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.

You can email me at:
Crossdressers-wmi@hotmail.com

The Grand Illusions website is at:
http://www.crossdressersmichigan.com

SUCH FUN!
BillieAnneJean

 

DOES EVERY BOY WHO TRIES ON MOM’S SLIP BECOME A CROSSDRESSER? Part D of a ramble.

2015/0223
Some things to think about Part D

DOES EVERY BOY WHO TRIES ON MOM’S SLIP BECOME A CROSSDRESSER?

For most boys it ends right there. So the answer is NO.

For a small percentage it does not end there, some become crossdressers and begin a lifelong “hobby” ranging from once in a great while to frequently. But still on the emotional level as a hobby. This group ranges from a guy in a dress or wearing panties under guy clothes to CDers who look REALLY GOOD. Still only doing it a small percentage of their time. Living life just about like any other guy, but one that is most likely keeping it a secret. These guys are the most typical and largest percentage of CDers.

For some it is a lifelong obsession and/or emotional need. The stronger the obsession or need, the more often it is necessary to transform themselves into looking like a woman. Or just wearing a skirt or dress, some piece of women’s clothing is enough to satiate their need. These are a smaller percentage than the larger “hobby” group. Still ranging from a guy in a dress or wearing panties under guy clothes to CDers who look REALLY GOOD. This group may be doing this anywhere from a small percentage of their time to frequently. But still mostly living life like any other guy, but with a better sense of fashion.

Some have a desire to live as much as possible as a woman. They may even be doing this 24/7. They may have changed their identity, given up a marriage, changed jobs, lost friends, lost everything.

And then there are a few, a small percentage, who will actually “transition”. This usually involves surgery and an identity change. Therefore no turning back. Frequently accompanied with the loss of relationships, family, huge sacrifices. No one does this lightly.

This behavior is not socially accepted in the USA. Men dressed in women’s clothing is unacceptable. It is not uncommon for guys who crossdress to experience violence at the hands of homophobes. It is not uncommon for people to express their “enlightened”, “justified”, and “expert” opinions on the subject to crossdressers. You can be a DUI danger to anyone on the road or a pickpocket checking them out, but if you go out in public dressed in a women’s clothes, you are a horrible person to some. They “understand” only what they see and perceive as different from them. Little do they know that their “normal” world is not normal in another place. But in the western world, if you want to make fun of a group, don’t do the African Americans, Native Americans, Jews, Muslims, Gays, women. But rest assured that any guy in a dress is fair game. Even if that guy was born with the physical body of a man but the brain of a woman. Yes that happens and those people suffer for it. Like gays used to.

So the answers is not as easy as checking a box.
Box 1 = Not crossdresser
Box 2 = Crossdresser and sex change

For family members, you have to ask the person and listen to what they tell you.

More on this in a future thread after this one is complete. In a few weeks.

DSCN4695Shopping at the mall.

Crossdressing need not be a crises for everyone involved. Sure some guys want to go the Full Monty and become women. But the vast majority of crossdressers that I encounter just want to have fun, like Cindy Lauper’s song Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.

You can email me at:
Crossdressers-wmi@hotmail.com

The Grand Illusions website is at:
http://www.crossdressersmichigan.com

SUCH FUN!
BillieAnneJean

WHEN DID HE START CROSSDRESSING, YOUR NEIGHBOR? Part C of a ramble.

BV_01657 (2)

2015/02/18
Some things to think about Part C

WHEN DID HE START CROSSDRESSING, YOUR NEIGHBOR?

Maybe one day when we were a young boy, alone at home for a few minutes, we succumb to the temptation and try on a slip, or panties, or a bra. It is just out of curiosity, what is all the fuss about? The first thing we feel is the fabric on our skin. A sensation totally unlike our cotton world we live in. It feels sensuous and wonderful. But we know if we get caught, we will be in big trouble. So we end up feeling like we just did something wrong. Like looking up a girl’s skirt, shame. But it felt good. One day we go one step further. Mom and sis are gone, dad is at work, home alone at last. We try on the whole thing. Her undies, stockings, shoes, and a dress. We are almost her size now. The fabrics feel so good on our skin. The stockings are heavenly against our legs. Tottering on the heels is a little difficult but a sensation all their own.

More thoughts on this to come every few days.

Crossdressing need not be a crises for everyone involved. Sure some guys want to go the Full Monty and become women. But the vast majority of crossdressers that I encounter just want to have fun, like Cindy Lauper’s song Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.

You can email me at:
Crossdressers-wmi@hotmail.com

The Grand Illusions website is at:
http://www.crossdressersmichigan.com

SUCH FUN! BillieAnneJean

WHAT’S WRONG WITH GUY STUFF? Part B of a ramble.

2015/02/17
Some things to think about Part B

WHAT’S WRONG WITH GUY STUFF?

For some of us it starts at a very early age. The majority of our time is spent in cotton, our choice of blue, black, gray, and if it is really hot and sunny, maybe tan, most of the time from our toes to our neck. Not very expressive, almost everything else is forbidden. We look pretty much the same 24/7. Not quite a penguin – unless it is a formal occasion – but certainly more of a gray wolf, all the time. The cloth is scratchy and maybe itchy. Our skin is allowed to become dry in the winter and we get sweaty in the summer. We liked being a rough and tumble boy. Maybe we noticed our sisters and mothers morphing from one look to another. Bright colors when they choose, soft and silky fabrics if they choose. Dresses sometimes when they would rather be wearing pants. Long or short hair. Made up on special occasions or plain. Different but the same person, sort of. More boyish if they chose, more girlish if they chose. Maybe occasionally some of both. Being a guy has advantages but just take a look in the men’s department if you have too much variety in your life. Women have a cornucopia of choices from the undies to the coats to shoes to hair to lip color to nail color to bling. Guys just don’t. We get to change our tie color. It’s OK but not very expressive. Perhaps that is why there are so many men in rock bands, designing women’s clothes, building cars, because we have to find outlets for our creative side.

More thoughts on this to come every few days.

rsz_dsc08706Resting my feet after
dancing to the wee hours.

Crossdressing need not be a crises for everyone involved. Sure some guys want to go the Full Monty and become women. But the vast majority of crossdressers that I encounter just want to have fun, like Cindy Lauper’s song Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.

You can email me at
Crossdressers-wmi@hotmail.com

The Grand Illusions website is at:
http://www.crossdressersmichigan.com

SUCH FUN!
BillieAnneJean

WHERE ARE THESE CROSSDRESSERS? Part A of a ramble.

2015 02 16
Some things to think about Part A.

WHERE ARE THESE CROSSDRESSERS?

Right there. Between the one story ranch and the colonial. That’s where he lives. Your neighbor the crossdresser. His home and yard are well kept, he drives an older car, not flashy at all. His wife is a sweetie, they are in what seems to be a happy marriage. Their grown children have made them happy grandparents. He is a mechanic at the local car dealer, a regular type of guy. He even has a motorcycle. He has been a good employee, husband, father, and seems to be a doting grandfather. You don’t know about his secret. He is an excellent neighbor. How could he be a cross dresser? Who would have ever guessed? Within an hour drive there are a hundred guys like this. I am one of them.

More thoughts on this to come every few days.  But meanwhile I gotta stop my knees from chattering.  Its 10 degrees here! rsz_bv_01416 (1)

Crossdressing need not be a crisis for everyone involved. Sure some guys want to go the Full Monty and become women. But the vast majority of crossdressers that I encounter just want to have fun, like Cindy Lauper’s song Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.

You can email me at:
Crossdressers-wmi@hotmail.com

The Grand Illusions website is at:
http://www.crossdressersmichigan.com

SUCH FUN!
BillieAnneJean

What my BLOG goals are and why am I doing this?

2/15/2015

I have never been one to keep secrets from my SO.  She is everything to me and I would throw myself in front of a train for her.  I love her with every molecule of my body.  If you knew her you would understand.  There things that she does much better than I and I can ask her advice and counsel on.  There are things that I am better at than she and she depends on me for those.  The whole is greater than the sum of the parts.  And I am a much better man because of her.  She is my pearl of great price.

I was a late starter to crossdressing.  I never even considered it until one day I was researching glamor photographs for my SO and stumbled on incredible glamor photographs of some women.  Exactly what I was looking for so my wife could see how beautiful she looks to me.  And they had videos of the shoots in progress.  But when I clicked on them, they WERE GUYS!!!!  I had never heard of this!!!  AND IT LOOKED LIKE FUN!
I asked my SO before I started.  I kept no secrets from her.  Things between us were good when I first started.

Then she started doing on line “research” and found that I was gay, going to change sex, not going to be her man anymore, wanted to crossdress 24/7, that crossdressing was something I HAD to do.  That I panged for it when I was with her.  Al things totally not applicable to me.  And for two years I patiently explained to her WHY those things were NOT ME.

There is a lot of information on the internet about CDing.  Some of it good.  Some of it extreme.  If you are a CDer and your SO experiences what mine did your life could be HELL like mine was for nearly two years.  But I love my SO.  I will do ANYTHING for her, stop doing anything for her.  And I did not give up.  And finally we worked through it.  And she is happier now than before I started CDing.

I am a run of the mill CDer in that I do it a small percentage of the time.  I NEVER want to change sex.  Although I have gay friends and gay people that I respect and admire, even care deeply about, I am not gay.  Although I know and value the friendship of friends that are transitioning from one gender to the other, that I care deeply about, that is not for me either.  I am very lucky to be right where I want to be, what I want to be. A MAN who happens to crossdress part time.

Perhaps I can provide some help to others to make their path through the discovery of a spouse crossdressing.

Because no matter how separate we may think we are, we are all somewhat responsible for each other’s happiness.
Hugs!

Billie

 

Girls just wanna have fun!
Girls just wanna have fun!

Hello world!

Welcome to Billie Anne Jean’s Blog!

I am the Facilitator for The Grand Rapids Crossdresser Social Group “The Grand Illusions”
http://www.crossdressersmichigan.com
My Email is:
crossdressers-wmi@hotmail.com
You can find me on Facebook too.

I am NOT interested in sex, men, or any relationships except with my beloved SO.
I am in a committed long term relationship to her.
Crossdressing is FUN and harmless.

DSCN1704 (2)Billie at the office.